How to talk to your child about the dangers of alcohol

Parents can help avoid alcohol addiction in adolescence and adulthood

Parents can have a big influence on whether or not their children drink alcohol. The earlier you talk to your child about the dangers of alcohol, the better. Statistically, children who were told about it by their parents were half as likely to use alcohol as their teens.

A recent study was conducted among high school students. It showed that alcohol use among high school students has been declining in recent years, with more than 60 percent of the children surveyed saying they don’t drink alcohol at all. The bad news, however, is that some teens said they use marijuana instead of alcohol.

In this article, we will look at how parents can talk to their children about the harms of alcohol. But the tips listed here can also be used to talk to children about the harms of marijuana and other drugs.

Don’t wait until your child reaches adolescence to talk about this topic. You’ll probably want to revisit the topic more than once when the child is a little older and new temptations come into their lives.

1. Talk to your child about the dangers of alcohol as early as possible, the first chance you get.

When you hear on the news about an accident that happened because of alcohol abuse, talk to your child about it (even if he is only 7 years old). Tell him, “It’s so sad. That’s why children and teens shouldn’t drink alcohol: a child’s body can’t handle it yet.”

Answer your child’s questions.

A child may answer you, “But why are adults allowed to drink alcohol? Accidents and accidents happen to them, too.”

Tell him, “You’re right, honey. No one should get behind the wheel when they’ve been drinking. Alcohol affects the brain in children and adults alike. That’s why a person can’t think clearly. But for adults who drink alcohol in moderation, these changes are temporary. When children try alcohol before their brains are formed, it slows brain development. Therefore, the effects of alcohol take a long time to manifest. In addition, this is how such children run the risk of developing an alcohol addiction as adults. That’s why it’s so important not to use alcohol until you’re an adult.”

3. Set clear expectations

For age 7: “When is it okay to drink alcoholic beverages? That’s right – only as an adult.”

For age 11: “I have to take care of your health. I know that some of your peers are trying alcohol. You’re probably interested in that, too. You can always tell me anything or ask me anything that interests you. Together we can figure out what to say to your friends. But I don’t want you to try alcohol. It will do you a lot of harm.”

For 15-year-olds: “When you’re an adult, you can decide for yourself whether or not you drink alcoholic beverages. But right now I have to take care of you. Drinking alcohol is against the law. Besides, it is dangerous for you. I want you to take care of your safety, and I want you to have a better life now and in the future.”

For all ages: “You can’t smoke marijuana. Your brain is still developing, and any psychoactive substance affects it. When you become an adult, you will make your own choices. But I expect you not to smoke it until you are of legal age.

4. give your child the facts before they need them

A teenager might tell you, “Many of my peers have already tried alcohol. Why should I wait until I’m older?” In response, give him arguments like this:

Because your brain is still developing, drinking alcohol changes the way it works. In other words, alcohol makes you less intelligent and less happy – for the rest of your life;
because kids who try alcohol before age 15 are four times more likely to develop alcohol addiction than those who first try it after age 20;
Because being a teenager is hard. To make the right choice, you need to think hard. Under the influence of alcohol, teens can’t think straight, and may do things they later regret;
Because it can be bad for your physical shape (this argument may be especially persuasive for kids who play sports or watch their weight);
Because it is illegal.

5. Stay open to communication

Children often check to see if their parents are overreacting before they tell them their biggest problems. So when a child tells you how their classmates tried alcohol, take the time to say, “That’s terrible!” Be patient and ask your child. Don’t judge him or her, but encourage him or her to think about the harms of alcohol. Ask leading questions: “What were the other kids doing at the time?”, “Did you want to try it too? Why?”, “How did it end?”, etc.

6. Teach your child, not try to control him

You can’t control your child when he is out of your sight. But you can teach your child good values and common sense. Set a good example and talk to your child. Ask your child questions to make him or her think about what is important to him or her and who he or she wants to be. Listen carefully to what your child tells you. This way you can understand a lot about the child:

Why do you think children and teenagers shouldn’t drink alcohol?
What would you do if you and your group were driving around in a car and the driver had been drinking?
What if it wasn’t your friend, but an adult (like his or her father)?
Do you know adults who drink a lot? What do you think about that?
Do you ever feel like your dad and I drink too much? If so, how did that make you feel?
Do you know any of your peers who have tried alcohol? Do you consider it a problem?
Why do you think teenagers try alcohol?
At what age do you think kids are ready to try alcohol?
How do your peers party? Have you ever been to one?
Have you ever been offered a drink? What was your response? Why?
What would you do if you were offered a drink and you didn’t want to look stupid?
Imagine you’re at a party and you’re a little nervous. What could calm you down other than a drink?
What would you do if someone at the party got sick from drinking?
Do you worry that you might become addicted to alcohol? Why?

7. Tell your child about the different situations he or she may find himself or herself in

The child will have to make decisions. Tell the child how to behave in these situations – for example, when they are offered a drink:

No thanks, I’m driving;
No thanks, I need to be clear-headed tonight;
No, thank you, I don’t drink;
No, thank you, exercise is too important to me;
No, thank you, I’m allergic to alcohol;
no thanks, I’ll have a Coke;
no thanks, I’m on medication that can’t be mixed with alcohol;
no thanks, my parents will kill me if they find out I’ve been drinking. And they always find out.

8. Come up with strategies with your child to deal with different situations

Most teenage parties are not without alcohol. Adult gatherings often involve drinking alcoholic beverages, too. Talk to your child about how he or she can go to parties and not drink.

For example:

The child can socialize with other teens who don’t drink alcohol and do their own hobbies in their free time;
the child can ask his or her parents to use alcohol less often at home or to give it up altogether;
The child can ask a friend who also doesn’t drink to go to a party with him or her for mutual support;
Make a plan with your child in case everyone at the party drinks alcohol. For example, the child can warn the party planner ahead of time that he or she will need to leave early.

9. Make sure your child has other ways to spend his or her free time

Teenagers are constantly testing themselves in new situations. They need excitement and risk taking. So encourage your child to meet his needs safely. For example, he can skateboard, go rock climbing, or enroll in an acting class

10. Teach your child to say no.

When parents demand complete obedience from a child, later he does not know how to say no. When a child tries to object to you, listen to his arguments and try to find a solution that suits you both. This is how you raise a child who wants to cooperate and follow their moral values. If you want your child to listen to you, remember that your decisions are not always the right ones. It’s better to instill moral values in him and then he will do the right thing, no matter what he is told.

11. When your child has already tried alcohol, talk to him about it

Whether you like it or not, most kids try alcohol before the age of 18. Your job is to delay that moment as long as possible. Keep good communication with your child – this way you’ll know when he or she will try alcohol for the first time and you can help him or her. Talk to your child about safety in these situations: “You’re probably curious about how alcohol works, and you’d like to try it. But you can’t know in advance how your body will react. What can you do to keep yourself safe? Will you have a friend you can count on? How will you get home?”

12. Come up with a plan for how you can help your teenager

Come up with a specific word or just a smiley face with your teen that means, “Come and get me.” When you get such a message from your child, you should pick him up from the party. If you come up with such a word, it will allow the teenager to tell his friends that his strict parents are forcing him to come home for family reasons. More often than not, friends won’t even ask anything, but even if they do ask: “What’s wrong?” the teenager might reply, “You know my mom. She always has something urgent.”

Don’t let your procrastination lead to bad consequences. Tell your teen, “Don’t hesitate to call me if you or your friends have a problem. Don’t be afraid of punishment, call – I will always help.

13. Set a healthy example for your child

Studies have shown that children are more likely to use alcohol when influenced by a bad parental example. Therefore, if you drink a lot, your child is likely to start drinking alcohol at an early age as well.

Show your child an example of a healthy attitude toward alcohol. It is equally important to teach your child how to deal with his or her emotions.

14. Develop your child’s emotional intelligence

Teach your child to recognize and deal with their emotions. Help him or her find positive ways to cope with stress. Teenagers often resort to alcohol in these cases, especially if they don’t have healthier ways to cope with their feelings.

15. Always stay emotionally connected to your child

Stay in touch with him or her at any age. It depends on it if you can influence him or her.